Just like that bird..

Day 192 #365DaysWild

Every so often a little bird stuns itself on the windows of our big patio doors. It will lie dazed. If it is lucky it will slowly regain itself with small movements. It takes time. Then it will off groggily.

Sometimes I feel just like that bird.

Emotionally battered. I think it’s an age thing. Less emotionally resilient.

Today a letter from the county council about the funding of mum’s care.

Although, after phone calls and talk there was good news in it, my head was mush. I sat stretched out on the sofa with the energy drained from me.

Jill around to check about mums evening meal. She’d chosen to eat alone.

Jill asked why her dinner had cooled and hadn’t been eaten.

Mum answered that she was waiting for dad.

Jill said ‘You know he won’t be coming home..?’

Mum answered ‘Yes’.

This has been one of the better days. Mums memory has pretty much gone but she joined us for lunch.

But that day when she has to be cared for away from here is getting closer and I’m dreading telling her.

In a while I’ll fly off groggily.